


Leaving

by MJAmore



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: John Denver - Freeform, Leaving on a jet plane, Love, M/M, Military, ziam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-19
Updated: 2014-07-19
Packaged: 2018-02-08 02:41:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,902
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1923696
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MJAmore/pseuds/MJAmore
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ziam Palik AU.</p><p>"You and you alone make me feel that I am alive. Other men it is said have seen angels, but I have seen thee and thou art enough."- George Edward Moore</p><p>The love shared between them was more than either ever dreamed of. But when the unthinkable happens, will the love they built weather the storm? </p><p>Zayn Malik//Liam Payne; oneshot.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Leaving

******All my bags are packed**  
 **I'm ready to go**  
 **I'm standin' here outside your door**  
 **I hate to wake you up to say goodbye**  
 **But the dawn is breakin'**  
 **It's early morn**  
 **The taxi's waitin'**  
 **He's blowin' his horn**  
 **Already I'm so lonesome**  
 **I could die**

 

           “Don't go.” Zayn's mouth had yet to leave his skin since they first fell into bed late the night before. Liam sighed into the pillow as he felt finger tips ghost over his hip. The sun had begun to rise on the cool spring morning, signaling the beginning of a day neither of them were completely prepared for. Liam turned on his back to look up at Zayn and lifted a hand to draw a finger along the line of his jaw. Even with eyes half closed from exhaustion, he found Zayn to be the most beautiful man he'd ever seen.

           “You know that I have to.” Enlisting in the Royal Air Force had been his plan since he was young. His father and grandfather had both served Queen and country. Liam had always known he would do the same. All of the plans he'd made as a young child had fallen into place but he had not factored in love.

           At nineteen he took advantage of leave and spent time traveling. Two days into his trip, Liam found himself in a park in London. Lost in thought, he stopped paying attention to what was in front of him. To say that Zayn was infuriated when Liam had walked right into his painting was an understatement. Liam covered in paint and Zayn prepared to dislocate his jaw for ruining his work, Liam did the only thing he thought he might defuse the situation. He laughed. Hours later, he was nursing a bruised jaw with a bag of frozen food and completely hung up on the boy who'd thrown the punch. How wet paint and violence had turned into love, he would never know. But it had. Oh, it had.

           “And if something happens to you?” Zayn wrapped his arms around Liam's torso and tucked his head under his chin. Liam didn't offer words of comfort. Instead, flipped Zayn to the flat of his back in one effortless swoop and pressed his lover into the mattress. His mouth crashed against Zayn's and he was not left wanting.  
  
 **So kiss me and smile for me** **  
** **Tell me that you'll wait for me** **  
** **Hold me like you'll never let me go** **  
** **'Cause I'm leavin' on a jet plane** **  
** **Don't know when I'll be back again** **  
** **Oh babe, I hate to go**

           Zayn refused to make eye contact with him as they pulled bags from the taxi. The love making in the early hours of the day forgotten as Liam insisted it was time to leave. Zayn had begrudgingly gotten dressed and made breakfast for the both of them. One last day of normality before Liam was gone for months on end.

           Liam gathered his bags and slung them on one shoulder. Although he'd never admit it, Liam had never been more nervous then he was now. Not only was he about to really begin a career he'd been preparing for his whole life, he was leaving the man he loved behind. Deployment seemed so unimportant to him before Zayn.

           The last sixteen months had gone by slowly and so very quick at the same time. The prospect of being away the next four months left him with a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach. Not caring who was watching, Liam pulled Zayn close and kissed him with every ounce of feeling he could muster. As Zayn pulled away, he rested his forehead against Liam's.  
  
           “Stay safe and come back to me.”

 ******There's so many times I've let you down**  
 **So many times I've played around**  
 **I tell you now, they don't mean a thing**  
 **Ev'ry place I go, I'll think of you**  
 **Ev'ry song I sing, I'll sing for you**  
 **When I come back, I'll bring your wedding ring**

 

           Sitting just outside the barracks, Liam gripped the ring hanging on the chain next to his dog tags. If you looked closely, you'd find a date etched into the band. The day they met. Liam had every intention of asking Zayn to marry him as soon as he got back. In many ways, he regretted his decision to wait. Forever with Zayn was a fairytale he couldn't wait to live out.

           The long hours in the air and even longer hours in the field left Liam drained. He felt as if every muscle in his body was on strike. It was unlikely he would find any form of rest in the foreseeable future as insurgents had begun making their presence known. So far the bombings had not caused any real damage but left everyone on edge. His shoulders slumped and a moment later a hand gripped his shoulder. He looked up to find Harry, a long time friend and fellow pilot looking down at him.

           “Enjoying the day are you?”

           “Yes, in all of it's glory.” Liam shrugged off Harry's hand and stood. Harry chuckled before shoving a crumpled letter into Liam's chest

           “Well, I'm sure that poetry shit Zayn's always writing will cheer you up. Rounds in fifteen.” Liam smiled at Harry's retreating form before tearing into the letter. 

  
 **So kiss me and smile for me** ****  
**Tell me that you'll wait for me** ****  
**Hold me like you'll never let me go** ****  
**'Cause I'm leavin' on a jet plane** ****  
**Don't know when I'll be back again** **  
****Oh babe, I hate to go**

 

           A sigh escaped Zayn as he placed the last piece of his showing. A small gallery to be sure but the first show dedicated solely to his work. Any pride he felt was dampened by the fact that he hadn't heard from Liam in weeks. Going into this, Zayn had been well aware that Liam could potentially be cut off for days at a time but some where in his mind he'd convinced himself that it wouldn't happen that way.

           Zayn took in the set of twelve paintings he'd poured his soul into. If one paid attention, a flow of color could be seen running from one to the next. They may have been painted on twelve separate canvases but they were one story. It told of love but not just any love. A great love. One that would stand the test of time. The imagery of one hand reaching for another. A flower just before it reaches full bloom. The light of dawn wiping away an remnants of the night. The strength of the mighty oak tree. A figure in the distance neither present nor gone. New eyes wouldn't see the connection but Zayn saw Liam in every single one. He'd found what it meant to not just see but feel beauty. Marlow, the owner of the gallery, stepped into the room with her evening gown flowing behind her. Zayn managed a smile as she spotted him standing there.

           “Zayn.” She took in a breath before taking her time walking past every piece. She turned to him with a brilliant smile. “This is absolutely stunning.”

           “Thank you.” A blush spread across his face. He'd always appreciated Marlow's opinion even before he'd brought her his first piece to sell. Her words warmed his heart. She walked to him and left a kiss on his cheek.

           “If you could give love a physical form-” Marlow cleared her throat and took in another breath before continuing. “He is going to be so proud of you.”

           “I wish he could be here to see it.” Marlow's smile faltered a bit. Rather then allow himself to dwell on Liam and his well being, Zayn excused himself to dress for the event. Formal wasn't his style but it was Marlow's. Seeing as it was her gallery, he decided the suit was best. Nerves were starting to get the better of him. He wasn't sure of the cause but the butterflies he'd felt earlier began to intensify. Zayn pulled on his jacket and continued in his attempt to settle himself. His mother found him in the back as he was attempting to secure his tie.

           “Zayn.” The use of his name and nothing else left him breathless. He turned to see the remnants of tears on a sympathetic face and he knew.

           “No.”

  
 **Now the time has come to leave you** ****  
**One more time** ****  
**Let me kiss you** ****  
**Then close your eyes** ****  
**I'll be on my way** ****  
**Dream about the days to come** ****  
**When I won't have to leave alone** **  
****About the times, I won't have to say**

 

           “ _They can't find him. Apparently there was a bombing and quite a bit of chaos. It took hours before they had an accurate count of missing or injured. He was doing rounds in the area when the bomb hit. They aren't- Well, they aren't sure if he made it out. Ruth called. Karen hasn't spoken a word. Geoff refuses to leave his study. I just don't-Oh, Zayn. Baby, talk to me.”_

           Zayn pulled his hood further down as he stared out of the second floor window. It'd been weeks since he'd first been told Liam was missing. His heart constricted as if hearing it again for the first time. Fresh tears began to fill his eyes but he held them back. As much as anyone claimed to understand how terrible this was for him, they knew nothing. Emptiness would have been a kind feeling. It was as if he was begin deprived oxygen. Zayn would have given anything to feel nothing at all rather then this endless torment. His mother had tried speaking to him with no success. His younger sisters seemed to sense that he needed more comfort then they could offer but they tried anyway.

           Zayn hadn't stepped foot in the home he and Liam shared since he'd been told. He was staying with his family. At this point, they had little hope that they would even have any reason to have a funeral. There was no body to bury. No way of knowing if Liam were dead or missing. They'd been told the chances were very slim that they'd find him at all let alone alive. Zayn pulled the sleeves on his sweatshirt to wipe the tears he hadn't realized had fallen. He couldn't even seem to straighten out feelings from thought. Everything was distorted. His dreams brought Liam back to him only to have him ripped away again come morning.

           Three weeks. There had only been three weeks left before Liam would have come home. The last letter Zayn had written went unanswered as he imagined it always would. All of the decelerations of love and promises of tomorrow that filled those pages were no better then a work of fiction. Never to be. For Zayn, there was nothing else. The second half of their story had been ripped free of the book's binding. There would be happy ending. It simply stopped.

            “You know that I have to.” Zayn laced fingers through the tangles in his hair and pulled in an attempt to quiet the voices that burned from his core to the tips of his toes. The words of his last days with Liam ran on a loop. Day and night. Night and day. Endless.

           Numb. Yes, numb would be a kindness.

 **Oh, kiss me and smile for me** ****  
**Tell me that you'll wait for me** ****  
**Hold me like you'll never let me go** ****  
**'Cause I'm leavin' on a jet plane** ****  
**Don't know when I'll be back again** **  
****Oh babe, I hate to go**

 

           Harry Styles straightened his dress jacket as he stepped out of the taxi. He pulled his case out of the seat before handing the taxi fair to the driver. Realizing rain was well on it's way, Harry opened an umbrella he was glad he had thought to bring. He turned on his heal and took in the street around him. Harry had never expected to make a trip like this one but he owed his friend. He could have had the driver take him to the exact address but he needed a few minutes to collect himself.

           Two blocks were all that was between him and delivering news that would define this family's future. The insurgent attacks had been consistent during their tour in Afghanistan and unfortunately one had been more successful then others. In the days that followed, those who had not been caught in the bombing spent hours searching for those who had. Days turned into weeks. One by one the missing had been found bruised and bleeding but alive. All but one. Losing a comrade was never easy but each member of the squadron had considered themselves more brothers then anything.

           Families of the missing had been notified of the situation almost immediately. It was not as simple as sending everyone home overnight. Transport had to be arranged not to mention arrangements to carry a fallen pilot on his final trip home. Harry had taken it upon himself to carry the news to the family of their fallen brother.

           His walk had come to an end and Harry stood at the door. He let out a breath before raising a hand to the door knocker. It was time.

  
 **But, I'm leavin' on a jet plane** ****  
**Don't know when I'll be back again** **  
****Oh babe, I hate to go**

 

           The weather seemed determined to match his internal climate. Rain had soaked through his sweatshirt and had begun to weigh him down. Deciding the jacket wasn't worth the effort, he pulled it off and tossed it on the bench next to him. The only benefit of the rain falling was that the tears he'd stopped trying to hold in were easily hidden. Exhaustion had settled into his body like an old friend. Sleep remained elusive. Zayn let his eyes close as the rain picked up. He wasn't sure how long he'd been sitting there but his mother had told him that staring out the same window wasn't healthy. Rather then listen to another lecture, he'd left and found himself sitting on a park bench.

           “It's raining.” The voice was one that Zayn had become accustomed to hearing both during sleep and wake hours. Liam haunted him in every possible way.

           “Don't know why it bothers you.” Zayn settled against the back of the bench. “You're not really here.”

           “Is that so?”

           “Go away.” Zayn reached up to pinch the bridge of his nose.

           “I think I've been away long enough.”

           Zayn let out a humorless chuckle and elected to not continue to converse with himself. The rain continued to fall around him but it was almost as if he could hear every single drop connect with the pavement. As if time had slowed to a slow crawl and his heart beat slowed with it.

           “I fail to see how that is funny. Have I missed something?”

           “I don't know why I bother to try and ignore you. I must be losing my mind.” Zayn scoffed. “And now I'm talking to you. Jesus.”

           “Babe.”

           “No. No, I'm not doing this.” Zayn lifted a hand to drag it over his face. It seemed crazy but he began to think if he kept his eyes closed, Liam might stay longer this time.

           “Babe, look at me.”

           “No.” Zayn stood so quickly it left him off balance. A hand caught his arm to steady him. Zayn's eyes snapped up to find Liam staring back. He choked on a sob as Liam drew him into his arms.

           “Liam?” Zayn's hands tangled themselves in Liam's dress uniform as he pulled him forward. The umbrella Liam stood under fell away as Zayn crashed into him. His hand lifted to Liam's jaw and his thumb ran across the cheek of a face he thought he'd never see again. A smirk grew on Liam's face before pulling Zayn's mouth to his own. Hands pulled and tears fell as lovers too long apart grounded themselves in the reality that in this moment seemed infinite.

           The rain that continued to fall went unnoticed as Liam and Zayn continued to press into each other. Zayn's legs met with the bench and buckled sending him backward. Liam followed him as he fell to the seat. He hovered just above Zayn, lips close but not enough to touch. Hands fell away from his body and onto the bench on either side of him. Liam's eyes were closed and he drew in a deep breath. Moments later those eyes opened and met Zayn's with more emotion then could be described in simple words. Words paled in comparison. If this was a dream, he hoped he never woke up.

           “Please.” Desperation consumed him and voice broke. Liam leaned in and rested his forehead against Zayn's but his eyes remained open. “Please, tell me this is real.”

           “Real.” Zayn felt a smile begin to form and closed what little distance was between them. He'd spent hours. Days. Weeks. Pleading with a higher power he wasn't sure existed to bring Liam back to him. The teeth that pulled at his lower lip and hand griping the back of his neck were all the evidence he needed. Proof that fate had been lenient. He intended to take full advantage of such an offering.

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed! Please leave comments//kudos. They feed my soul. 
> 
> Thank you and shine on!


End file.
